Life Changing Moments.

My life is definitely in a whirlwind right now. I'm 36 weeks and 4 days pregnant with our first baby, a little girl :) who should be here any day now. We've decided to name her Isabella Grace Miville. Although it's pretty scary to be having a baby and taking such a big step in my marriage, I think everything will work out okay. My marriage is strong and Ryan and I love each other enough to do whatever it takes to make it work. He's doing great in school and I'm very proud of him. I think the most important thing to me when I found out I was pregnant was to not disrupt my education and I'm still in school and so is Ryan and we're not going to be leaving anytime soon which I'm extremely happy about. I value education unconditionally and am fully relying on it to make our lives even more wonderful one day. There's really nothing else new to report. I'm ready for this little girl to be here so I can start being a mother and stop being so pregnant and uncomfortable. Of course I worry about a million little things everyday, but that's to be expected; I've ALWAYS been a worrier. Hopefully the next time I have something to blog about it will be the birth of Isabella :)

Pondering

Lately I've been feeling pretty alone. I know I have Ryan, but lets face it, he's still a man and a man can't always give me the feedback in a conversation that I need. I feel like there is no one I can just call out of the blue when things are going crazy and I need to be talked down that very minute. I've never been too social and do enjoy spending time at home where I'm most comfortable, but I'd still like to make some friends here in Atlanta. It's just hard because with the hand I've been dealt lately I don't have the time to make friends and therefore don't have that "go to" person. I think everyone has those moments where they're so outdone they think they must be losing their minds and just need someone to tell them everything is okay. Things have been rough lately and although I keep telling myself it will get better, it will work itself out, time heals all wounds, I don't know how much I really believe those things right now. I guess that's enough for now, I just needed to vent and since I have no one I can vent to, blogging is the next best thing.

Life as of now.

So things have been pretty challenging lately. My marriage is still wonderful, so I am grateful for the blessings I do have. Ryan has been doing extremely well at Georgia Tech. I am so proud of him and how dedicated he is to out-performing himself and getting his degree. I'm pretty excited that the holidays are coming up, I love Thanksgiving and I love Christmas. Although now that Ryan and I are on our own Christmas won't be as extravagant as it used to be financially. I haven't met any "great" friends here yet and miss my friends in Augusta dearly. We've stopped going to Augusta every weekend simply because school and errands monopolize our lives and weekends are really the only time we have to calm down and chill out and traveling does not help me chill. I guess I'm rambling because I don't have anything else to report but I wanted to update.

I don't understand.

I've been really annoyed with how badly people want to bash Obama. I mean, I can't vote since I'm not a citizen and politics don't interest me, but I always believed that presidents deserved respect regardless of if you always agree with them or not. I mean, I didn't agree with almost anything Bush did but I still respected him as a president.

And this healthcare situation? I really don't get that. How can people not think there is a huge problem with America's healthcare system when there are millions of people who are uninsured? Believe it or not, it is extremely expensive to have good healthcare. And not everyone has that kind of money, even the hard working middle class. On top of that, so many healthcare companies won't even accept people who have pre-existing conditions. People that are sick are the ones who can't get healthcare! How is that not an problem?

I think that Obama is trying to fix the problems and people should respect that. At least he's doing something. I just don't get how a country can be so divided. Isn't it important to be united, especially when facing tough times? It's like all people are interested in doing is proving why this political party is better than the other or why Obama is horrible.

Come on. Americans are supposed to be be proud, hard-working, caring people. But when they act so ignorant as to say "I want my money and my doctors and my way and I don't care if other people are uninsured, that must mean they aren't working hard enough." That's a real shame.

The quality of doctors will not go down if Obama's health plan passes. Doctors will still be paid over $200,000 a year. Besides, the doctors who want to set their own outrageous fees aren't the ones who became doctors to help people anyway. Those are the doctors who just wanted the doctor salary.

I guess what I'm saying is that Americans need to learn that there are other ways to do things and the government is not trying to control the people. Other countries have the kinds of health plans that Obama is suggesting and they're doing great. I was raised in another country that, in my opinion, is run very well. I was born with health insurance and I had it till the day I died. And how amazing would that be? To have the gift of health without ever having to worry about paying for it?

In my opinion, overall health and happiness is more important than selfish ignorance. I can see how people think they don't owe anyone a penny, but, what if you lose your job and suddenly you need those benefits? What if you knew what it was like to work so hard but not be able to move forward economically? I guess people who are that stubborn are that way because they've never had to struggle and they don't know what it's like.

So, that's where my compassion comes from. Knowing what it's like to have nothing and have to work your way to the top. Knowing what it's like not to get health insurance because you have a heart condition, but that's exactly why you need it. Knowing what it's like to see free clinics filled with so many people that only get a crappy medical evaluation and are sent on their ways without a real diagnosis.

America....United States....land of the free?
more like, America, country unwilling to change its ways because it's "the best" and therefore will continue to make the same mistakes other countries have made instead of learning from them.

My Insomnia

So I suppose I will try the whole blogging thing again. I usually forget to update, but I like to keep all the important people in my life, who I don't talk to as much as I should, "in the know." I've been married for a month and four days and I love it. Of course I probably need to be married for a couple of years before I'll be able to give out marital advice. I really do love it though. It's so hard for people to understand why I married so young. I guess it was a combination of things. I grew up in Germany where children are adults at 16, so I feel like I matured faster than most people here because that's just my culture. Really though, whether a marriage lasts or not depends on the individual people. It depends on their maturity level, their love for each other, their commitment to each other and their overall goals in life. Ryan and I have been together for so long that we knew marriage was the next logical step. We're both very driven people, especially when it comes to our educations. No matter what happens, we put that first. We know the only way to get ahead in life is to have a degree. And I guess us sharing those values is another reason why we felt ready to be married.

It doesn't even bother me when people criticize my decision to be married young. The people I love are happy for me and I feel like I am doing it right. It's just part of my belief system, and if I'm right in GOD's eyes, how can anyone else say I'm wrong? Anyway, all that aside because it really is irrelevant what others think and say.

It's 6AM and I'm still awake. I've been having terrible insomnia lately and it drives me crazy. I need to get over this before school starts back up. Along with my insomnia I have been super exhausted, but I suppose those go hand in hand. Hopefully I'll get the hang of this blogging stuff again because as of now, I'm just rambling.

I'm nervous about school starting. I was comfortable at my old college and now I had to transfer. But who wouldn't transfer if their hubby got the opportunity to go to GA tech? All sports issues and fanaticism aside, GA tech is an amazing academic school that will guarantee him and great job one day. So, I definitely didn't mind moving up to Atlanta for that. Especially since his career is going to be the money-maker. (I'm going to be a teacher, so seriously).

Oh well, that's all I can think of for tonight/this morning. Hopefully I'll have something of bigger interest to report soon!